Thursday, February 18, 2010

Too Much in too short a time.

It really hits home to me whenever a loved one dies how short a time we have on this earth. I have found myself contemplating what's the meaning of all this pain and how it seems like we are just born to die. Fortunately I don't have a lot of time to ruminate on these melancholy thoughts. I have two birthday parties to throw, a funeral to attend, and a long car trip to plan.

I have discovered a profound distaste for the predatory nature and greed of the funeral home business. It is too late to undo what has been planned for my Dad but I know what I will not be doing when it the planning is up to me. I won't be buying a casket for 4 Grand when I can buy the same one online from Costco for 924.99 (this is the same one we bought for my Grandma from the overpriced funeral home). In fact I will do my best to skip using a funeral planning business at all costs. Grief is not a good reason to make stupid spending decisions and I don't believe you can't plan a nice funeral yourself.

My husband and I have also decided it was time to inter our baby boy's ashes after nine years of holding onto them, unsure of what to do. I priced the wooden urns at the funeral home and ending up buying a nicer one from a seller on ebay for half the price. He will be buried by my father in a few months and we'll pick a simple headstone.

So this is the month full of death and birthday celebrations. Life goes on even after death comes knocking. Today my precious daughter is 7 years old. Today my father is being cremated.
I've got to keep my feet moving forward.


Gail Rubin said...

My condolences on your father's death.

Cutting costs is one key reason to pre-plan funerals. You can shop around for the best price without the pressure of grief and no time to do something NOW. Plus you realize how much information you need and can get it without stress. And you don't need to pre-pay when you pre-plan, although funeral homes will encourage you to do so.

I write about these issues at my blog, The Family Plot: Funeral Planning for Those Who Don't Plan to Die ( Hope you'll visit!

Juliana E. said...

I agree with you on the funeral industry... I couldn't believe the cost of my father's funeral and then how much prices went up when we planned my mother's (Oct. 2009). They also didn't provide the same "service" they did for my father's funeral. So basically we got less for our money.

I am so sorry for your loss - losing a parent is so hard.

Heather said...

Jenny, I'm so sorry about the loss of your father. I will keep you in my prayers.

Lenox Knits said...

I'm so sorry about your Dad. I really wish I could have been there for the funeral. I remember how many nights we fought him for control of the TV and drove your parents crazy with by staying up all hours of the night.

It really sucks that the funeral home ripped your family off like that. We are so defenseless in that situation and want to do right by our loved ones.