Staying At Home Mom

Oh I had plans today. I did.

I was going to take Little Guy to the sitter (weird week because of holiday- no preschool and I've already paid for the sitter time so... free 5 hours, right?).

I had told Big Girl that it would be a Mommy/Big Girl day. She was excited. There was a tea party planned involving Little Elmo and her 'new' beanie Bear she named Bluey (he came out of a brown paper 25 cent grab bag at our 'new' thrift store.. and yes, I washed him).

Little Guy woke up grouchy, slow, and snotty. Not his usual chipper baby self. UH OH.
Well, I thought, maybe he's just tired. And I drove all the way to the sitter with him in the backseat, pulled into the parking lot, took the keys out of the ignition and looked in the rearview mirror. Oh, my sweet boy looked so out of it and snotty and I just wanted to be home with him. I won't lie. I look forward to those bits of time when I am free to clean, cook, or shop alone. It's time that I am blessed to have and only -need- because I frequently have to take Big Girl to school events w/o her sibling.

But, mommy guilt and mommy love made me drive straight home and even though I know he was confused and upset to be home again (he likes going to the sitter) I knew I
needed a quiet day at home with my two kids. It's something we haven't had for awhile. Time to just be still. Time to enjoy each other, occassionally melting into the couch together in a pile of toys, blankets and snuggly love.

Right now he's snuggling warmly next to me doing his panty baby breathing (one of the last vestiges of infanthood that I will truly miss when it's gone).
I have a million things to do: laundry, cleaning, cooking, present wrapping, Christmas letter writing etc. But, right now there's nowhere else I need to be.

The tea party is rescheduled for during his naptime. Laundry and everything else can wait. Because right now all we need is to just be still together.