Wednesday, August 4, 2010

The Temporary Happiness of Acquiring.

I love to shop. I love the idea of hunting for a that gem of a bargain that seems like will fulfill a grand purpose. Problem- I don't really love paying for shopping, taking care of more stuff and acquiring more stuff. I don't have room for anymore stuff. And what's more is that I want space more than I want things in my space. It's two warring halves of my personality. Minimalist desires mixed with the relentless drive to acquire and consume and it doesn't work very well.

I love the shopping but not the acquiring anymore. I don't feel joy anymore just the nagging drive to find things. Quitting shopping is like dieting. You can't really stop buying things forever anymore than you can stop eating. I'm always going to need something- toilet paper, socks, scotch tape, etc. just like I'm always going to need to eat. I just have to adjust my thinking on how I go about both of those things. And that is where I am right now. Struggling to change lifelong habits of shopping and eating.

I feel quite torn lately and I'm not having an easy time of it. So, right now I'm stalled.
And that's where I am right now.

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